No brain, my way of life

右脳、左脳、没脳
Right Brain, Left Brain, No Brain

My previous blog was about reaching a state of "no mind" to achieve success in martial arts and sports. My wonderful wife somehow found that article inspiring. Reading my writing, she cleverly disguised her admiration behind a fit of laughing. Her eyes gleamed when she said, "No mind? There's a better way to describe you. It's called No Brain." Then she resumed her giggles and laughter.

Ah yes, it's great to be loved.

But I must admit my clever wife is correct. I spend most of my time in a state of no brain. I remember all the very difficult things, such as how to solve difficult challenges in business or engineering. But I forget small things such as:

- My wife's birthday and and our wedding anniversary. This year I guessed within 2 or 3 days of the actual date.
- Different colored socks on each foot. Once I wore different shoes. At work I explained that I was taking dance lessons and needed to remember "right foot" and "left foot."
- The location of my keys and eyeglasses. It's really hard to find eyeglasses when I can't see very well. My keys...always lost.
- Sometimes I forget the location of my car. But this is a good thing. The policeman helping me reported that traffic safety dramatically improves whenever I do NOT drive. Ha! Everyone's a comedian. I will try to remember not to drive on the grass in front of his house...not again, anyway.
- how much money I might have in the bank. Why call the bank? I know there is still a lot of money there. They can make more.
- Anything I might have been talking about when a beautiful woman walks by.

Yes, normally I wander around the world in a confused state of no brain. Small things usually they play a game of hiding from me. They hide under my bed, behind bushes, or anywhere my brain might have strayed off to and then returned without memory.

Sometimes my state of no brain can be dangerous. When I was 17 years old, I was climbing a cliff and forgot to use my safety rope. I fell 30 meters and hit the ground. (true story). Fortunately, I managed to survive. But I learned my lesson. After that, at least 70% of the time I used my safety rope to prevent falling.

Sometimes no brain is embarrassing, sometimes not. With my wife, there's not too much embarrassment. She's accustomed to my lack of memory. When I wear a brown sock and blue sock, she just shrugs and hides her amusement behind loud laughter.

In business situations, however, I must be more careful. One day I shaved only half my face. Fortunately no one seemed to notice...but for some reason everyone kept pointing to the right side of their face when looking at me. I suspected that they must have had some type of nervous problem. I was relieved that I didn't suffer from THEIR problem. When I got home and looked at the mirror, I realized maybe MY problem was bigger than their problem.

My wife has learned to adjust and help me minimize no brain. Before I go on a long trip, she gives me a repeated quiz. "Do you have your passport?" yes. "Do you have your passport?" yes. "Do you have money, cell phone, computer, suitcase, clothes?" yes. "Do you have your passport?" Yes. Finally we arrive at the airport and I kiss her good bye. After she drives off I remember I forgot to say something to her...something very important before leaving my wife on a long international trip. Oh yes, I remembered! I call her quickly on the cell phone. She answers and asks what's up? I say, "Honey, I love you so much. You are the greatest. Can you do me a favor? I forgot my passport..."