Desperate Housewives Korean style

Desperate Housewives, Korea version

"Desperate Housewives" is a growing real-life phenomenon here in Korea. Who can blame them? Men work long killer hours at work and then go out drinking after work with their coworkers or customers. Spending time with family or your wife, putting family as a top priority...these things are not part of Korean business culture. Women are expected to work in an office or sales job just long enough to find a husband and then stay home. Career opportunities in management, engineering, computers, or other high paying careers are virtually non-existent for women. Someday GIRL POWER feminism will arise. Until then, desperate housewives are a common phenomenon. I meet many of them in my stay over here.

Korea society is growing fast and changing quickly. 30 years ago Korea was a relatively poor country that was getting back on its feet after decades of domination by Japan and the later civil war. Now Korea has stepped up to be a world leader with a thoroughly modern society, the world's 11th largest economy, companies like Hyundai and Samsung that rival the world's best, and a leadership role in Asia for movies, TV dramas and music.

How did Korea accomplish such an amazing transformation? The old fashioned way: through lots of hard work and sacrificing together as a society to re-build the whole country. This truly is an amazing accomplishment.

As happens everywhere, rapid change has good and bad effects. Korean traditional values and family-oriented lifestyles have suffered. Traditional Korean arts are being lost. Divorce rates are up, family satisfaction is down. Many men are unhappy working killer hours...but they have little choice. Many women are unhappy to have little choice other than stay home or have a low-paying office or retail job.

Yesterday was a holiday and I went out to a tourist site with my good friend Mr. Kim. We had a great time. On the way back I encouraged him to buy some flowers for his wife when he returns home, as a way to say "Thank you" for giving up her time with her husband to spend a day with the Crazy Foreigner. Mr. Kim looked puzzled and said, "Bringing flowers is not a Korean style. That might not work." Hmmm.... I wonder. I suspect wives are similar all over the world: simple "thank you" gifts can go a long way.

Naturally this gives me a hard reminder. I have my own beautiful wonderful wife. I am away from home far too much. I better remember to show her every day how much I appreciate her and miss her. Time for me to send off a nice electronic love card and place a long distance phone call to the best wife in the world - mine.